I have a sty in my eye, it’s an ‘internal’ sty, not the typical ‘external’ kind. I guess that’s because I’m special. :p
It’s painful, and it makes me look like I’ve got a wicked case of pink eye.
Nice.
NOT!
Anywho, it was a great excuse reason to skip church this morning. I don’t usually look for reasons to stay home from church. Today was different.
I let Shaylah stay home with me too. Neither of us are in good mental condition to be facing people today. Especially NOT people asking how it went with Alesia leaving this morning.
Alesia, my constant companion for the past TWENTY & a HALF years.
And now she’s off to Ontario. I refuse to call it a ‘move’. I’m calling it a temporary change of address.
Shaylah is equally as distraught this morning.
She’s Alesia’s sidekick and I think she’s feeling a little ‘lost’ as to what her place in this world is now that her big sister is gone.
Not sure when my little girl grew up, but today, it feels like it happened overnight.
One day I was baking a cake for her 2nd birthday.
Then she grew up and became a little girl.
Then she got old enough to be responsible for pets and even make candy, on her own.
A constant ‘big’ sister.
And then suddenly…
She grew up and a woman replaced the little girl.
Now she’s off to visit with family in Ontario, thousands of miles away. Visiting for two weeks, then working as a Nanny for a while. How long? We don’t know.
I’m kind of ok about all this, I knew it was coming, and it was even mainly my idea, with God’s FIRM nudging on my heart (I argued with Him about this for a few weeks…) but even though I know this is how things are supposed to be right now, it still doesn’t make it any easier.
We’ve been planning and preparing for this big move our family is making in just one week, for many many years now. Throughout ALL these years I have been praying one thing.
“Please God, let us move BEFORE my children are old enough to move out on their own.”
Why? Because I ALWAYS felt a need to have our final home, the place hubby and I grow old in, the family farm we end up with, to be the place our CHILDREN would all call home too.
The plan had always been to buy land, enough land for the kids to build too if they so pleased! Enough land for Alesia’s horses to run around on, for her to train horses, and maybe give riding lessons.
The plan was never to move separate from any of our children. The plan was never to move so much later then we are.
We’re a homeschooling family. We’re ALWAYS together.
Yet, here we are, years later, FINALLY moving and Alesia has moved onto Ontario a week ahead of us, while we’ll be going to Saskatchewan without her.
🙁
I know it’ll be alright, but today…
well…today is hard.
It is hard when they move far from us. I still struggle with it sometimes. Hang in there…
This post brought tears to my eyes. My eldest turns 10 this summer and I can’t believe how fast it is all going by (though I knew it would; everybody said so!). I can’t handle thinking about the day she moves away, but I can tell you this: I’m so glad we are a homeschooling family, like you. At least when she does finally fly from the nest I will have no regrets about not spending enough time with her when I had the chance. Hugs to you!