Sunday’s are my day to reflect on what I am thankful for.

I am thankful for a lot. God only knows how thankful I am.

However, this week, I’m also feeling a little tired. Weary.

This dream we have of moving to a ‘real’ farm, it seems to be taking f–o–r–e–v–e–r.

Five years is a long time to work towards a goal, with still no end in sight.

Day after day at times I almost feel like we’re wasting out lives away, forever waiting.

The children are growing up, our eldest, will be 20 this summer. The twins, our youngest, are already turning 12 at the end of the year.

We do our best to enjoy all we have here, while we have it. We try to create memories, enjoy the wonderful outdoors, explore the ocean, the mountains, all this Island has to offer. Friends and family who live close by.

All the things we’ll miss once that dream is realized.

Yet, while chasing our tails, it’s just getting more and more difficult… more and more tasking. We’re becoming more and more weary.

But I hate whining. I especially hate it when I whine.

I have so much to be thankful for. My husband, my children, our health, our animals, even our little homestead. I am so very thankful for it all...yet I can’t help but continue to hope that the dream will still one day come.

And then I feel like I’m not being very thankful again…

It’s this cycle of struggling with one’s desire to simply want, with one’s desire to be so incredibly thankful of this wonderful life, that causes the constant battle in which one grows tired.

Yet I won’t allow myself to mope, to continue to whine. I am far too blessed for that.

So for another day, another week, another month, God forbid yet another year, I will go forward, forever hoping for the dream to one day become a reality.

And in the midst of it all, continue to be thankful for every single second of it all.