As most of you know, Homestead Emporium is a Canadian company.
What a lot of you may not know though, is that although I’ve lived in Canada for many many years, I’m not actually Canadian! During these festive days, July 1st here in Canada, and July 4th in the US, I often find myself reflecting not just on Canada, but on my birth country as well.
In 1971, I was born in Holland.
In 1973, when I was just two years old, we came to Canada.
However, over the years growing up, I was blessed to visit Holland fairly regularly, and truly kept in touch with my Dutch heritage. I feel a very strong connection with Holland because of this.
I went back to Holland when I was seven years old.
My grandparents 40th Wedding Anniversary.
And again at 12 (that’s me and all the girl cousins born in 1971 on my father’s side! We have a VERY large family!) Over 60 grandchildren!
I even had the opportunity to attend school there for six weeks as a child.
When I visited Holland at the age of 12, it would be the last time I would see my father’s father, my Opa.
I could write a whole story just about my Opa, a very strong and proud man who started a company which is still growing today, many many years later! This portrait hangs on the wall of his factory. The large stair factory in Breda, Holland.
When I was 18, I lived in Holland for a full year and attended school and worked during my stay.
I also had a lot of fun. This crazy get up was for a festive time in Holland where everyone gets dressed up as ‘crazy’ as possible. Hee hee.
I also came very close to staying there, forever. However, the ‘love of my life’ at that time wasn’t completely 100% positive he felt the same as I did, so… I headed back to Canada when my year stay was over.
He may not have been sure what he wanted in his future, but I was 100% sure what I wanted in mine. A future of a family. Marriage & children.
Several months after I came back to Canada, I found my husband, my best friend. In February 1990 we met, we got engaged in March and were married in September of that very same year. What a whirlwind! The best decisions ever made in my life!
And the rest, as they say… is history!
Anywho…
Back to the point of my story.
During this weekend I find myself thinking often of Holland. The Netherlands, as my cousin reminds me I should call it.
To me it will always be Holland though.
Although I was blessed to spend much time in Holland while growing up, once I began having children, visiting Holland was no longer a possibility.
It’s much more difficult to come up with the funds for SEVEN people to travel then it is for just one, or even two.
I also wasn’t keen on traveling with only one or two of my children. Who would I pick? Who would I leave home? Who would care for them if I went away while my husband worked?
I also spent 12.5 years either pregnant or nursing.
By the time I was no longer pregnant or nursing, my grandparents, one by one, had all passed away. Shortly after the twins were born, my mother’s father passed away. I no longer had any living grandfathers. While the twins were still nursing, my father’s mother passed away. And most recently, just a couple of years ago, my mother’s mother passed away. The last of my grandparents were now gone.
Some people seem to feel as though if one doesn’t see their grandparents often, it must not hurt as much to have them pass on. Those people are kidding themselves.
When you grow up far away from your grandparents, not only do you mourn their deaths, you also mourn the loss of what never could be, but something you always hoped for. A close relationship.
Just because I didn’t see my grandparents very often does not mean I did not love them, or mourn their deaths, any less.
I live in Canada, I married a Canadian, yet, I am still Dutch. Why? I have no good answer.
My husband it Canadian through and through. His mother came to Canada from England when she was just 2 years of age, like myself. However, his father’s family has been in Canada for generations and generations, as far back as anyone can remember.
So right now my children are half Canadian, and half Dutch, because their mother is still Dutch.
On the one hand, that’s a strong reason for me to remain Dutch. I have a very difficult time giving up my Dutch ‘status’. I’m proud to be Dutch! I love that about me. However, I’m becoming more and more proud with every passing day to be a part of Canada.
I’ve been studying to take my Canadian citizenship test.
It’s taking me forever. The problem is two fold. I have ALL this spare time! Ha!
I don’t have any spare time. And I don’t study well. I’m horrible at remembering dates and names. These are kind of important in the test!
I’m also terrified of tests. I HATE tests.
However, I hate not being able to vote, not being the same nationality as my husband and children, and not being able to say “I’m Canadian” even more, so I will get over my fears, study hard (as hard as I can!) and take that test!
I’m thinking July 1st, Canada Day, 2012 might be a great day to become a Canadian. It’s Canada’s 145th Birthday. So for now, that’s my goal.
However, there’s some things I still LOVE about Holland, that I will ALWAYS miss.
When our son had the opportunity to go to Holland last year with his grandfather, I asked him to PLEASE get me some great photos.
I wanted to see WINDMILLS! And Holland. I wanted to see Holland.
I wanted to remember. All of it.
The country side.
The row houses.
The architecture (and the bikes, oh those bikes! How I miss riding bike over flat countryside!)
The views.
He didn’t disappoint. It was almost as though I had been to Holland myself while going through his photos. Almost.
One day, I hope to go there again. I hope to take my family. I’m so happy Joshua was able to experience Holland, to see the ‘other side’ of where he comes from. To enjoy some of his mother’s heritage.
And one day, I hope my other children will be able to do the same. I’d love to share it all with my husband, and our four girls.
One day!
Until then, I’ll be studying up on my Canadian history and laws in hopes of becoming a Canadian citizen some time, soon!
